Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Everything new, yet very old.

While I was away over Christmas 2009 and the New Year I was feeling very optimistic that 2010 would be our year, that hopefully the powers that be would see fit to let us have a year full of new things. New jobs, new location, new school for E, new beginnings and a new life for us all.

Here we are in the last week of Feb 2010 and oh yes we have new things, but not the things I was secretly hoping for.
I guess E got the new school part, high school. It's not a very well thought of school, no surprises for this area, but is the lesser of the two evil's. The other high school changed its name about 2-3 years ago in the hopes of shaking off its unsavory image, I've worked there personally, thankfully for just a month, it was hell. It confirmed to me that there was no chance I was allowing my child to go to that school, even though we are in it's zone. I had in fact planned for him to go completely out of zone, all the way into Newcastle, however we got word too late that E would be going on to high school so it was a scramble to find any school other than hell high. He is miserable at this school, they do not cater for children with learning issues. His confidence has been crushed and I am left feeling like a mother who has failed her only child. Awesome.
Moving on.
J and I have been applying for jobs all over the country, we are simply keen to work and work where ever we can find it. We have been applying for jobs for almost 6 months now, with not one single interview between us. Nada. We are finding it hard to keep a brave face, wondering what it is we have to do to gain employment. We won't be giving up of ever working in libraries, but for now we will apply for other jobs too. J is wondering why we did a 2 year diploma, can't say I blame him, but we will find something.
We are at a cross roads atm, wondering if we should take the risk and move to Victoria where most of the jobs seem to be, or sit tight and keep wondering if it would help if we lived more local to the jobs. E and I are all for moving, J is too but seems to be less hesitant than me. I find this somewhat amusing as it's me who will be leaving behind my family, my house and my son's friends. Only thing holding J here is E and I :) We have two options, move as I just said or stay put, find any work we can and accept it for what it is then be surprised when we finally get a job we can move too. Of course if you look at the pro's and con's we are probably better off staying put for now, since we have cheap accommodation, E has already started high school for the year, I can't be told no pets allowed and then there is a family and friends here. Downside is the lack of work opportunities, the kid next door, the bad school and the feeling of being miserable here.
I'm all for getting out there and finding your own happiness...but at what cost? I mean mere moments ago the brat next door was in our yard trying to take my son's bike ramp, a big black plastic ramp. E caught him and I heard it, so he bailed and went back into his own yard, his mother hearing the commotion upped him for it. Yes they have admitted they have a problem child on their hands and are at a loss. Sad really.
On the sad front, I am sad. Ok ok so its more than that. Yet again I have more medical drama going on. Towards the end of 2009 I was getting increasingly tired, napping once or twice a day. My initial fear was chronic fatigue. I went to the doctor's to get a blood test done, the results were low B12 levels, thankfully not chronic fatigue, been there before and it's not a nice place. This has resulted in getting B12 injections every month. I've just had my 2nd one last week and I have to say this past week I haven't felt the need to nap..except one afternoon after a day of 37C and overnight temps of 26C in the house. The other piece of un-fun medical news is that my doctor suspects the pain in my right hand is rheumatoid arthritis, probably as a result from the damage done to the root nerve that runs down my right arm. I'm on some anti-inflammatory drugs. Here I am at 34yo, my body is falling apart and I want to work, bit of a joke really isn't it. I am a dreamer and will continue to believe that someone somewhere is willing to take a chance on me and employ me. I'm only a little bit battered :)
The worst of it all really is that I am having a hard time knitting, very little is being done. I do have a shawl on the needles, Revontuli, in Kauni EQ (rainbow colourway) yarn. It's going to be a very slow knit. I did however manage to knit a Haruni Shawl some weeks back, it's a lovely pattern and I highly recommend it. I still have mum's Aeolian on the needles which I started on New Years Day. It looks like I am allergic to the yarn, which is a shame as it's just gorgeous. A 2ply lace silk, alpaca and cashmere blend. Now I haven't entirely given up on finishing it, even though it's now been neglected for several weeks. In fact I picked it up a few days ago to knit a row..but horror of all horrors I couldn't get the stitch count right for the row I was up too. Add to it I had hay fever and sneezed several stitches off the needles! I stopped, put her away again and will deal with her again soon enough.
Oh one last point. IF we stay here, I can have chickens and have another baby!!
No no no, not of the human variety, though I could do that of course, but in this case I am speaking about getting a Maine Coon cat. A brother or sister for Garfield. He needs one, really :) A big ginger baby to love and cuddle with and just be generally over pampered, as cats should be.
So while some things are new in our lives, the medical, job applications and school horrors are all really just the same old recycled troubles.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

From someone who has just upped and left for greener pastures, remember sometime the grass is greener, sometimes it is brown.
Brown grass is not dead, it needs fertilising, love and water, it grows. I say go for it. Most times applications from people living 100's if not 1000kms away are not looked at. Sorry to sound down, but I am speaking from experience. :)